Blogging/ My Super Bike
If you’re wondering why I haven’t been blogging the past couple days it’s because I’ve been very busy working on my new television show with Michael Showalter. What is it? It’s basically a show where Michael and I do sketches and argue with each other. Would you like to come and see us tape it? You can. How? Information will be posted here very shortly.
Also, as many of you know, I race dirt bikes on the weekend. This weekend was a big race in Big Sur, California, so I had to fly out there with my super bike. I ride a 350cc Kawasaki custom Megafuck 3000. A lot of people have never heard of the Megafuck line of motorcycles, mainly because no television station or magazine will allow Kawasaki to advertise this product due to its name and because the handlebars are shaped like big erect dicks. It’s a very popular bike on the dirt bike racing circuit though because of its great design, excellent handling, and superb reliability. Why they chose to outfit such a fine motorcycle with potentially offensive dick-shaped handlebars and a muffler that belches viscous white fluid that looks like jizz is beyond me. And then on top of everything, to call it “Megafuck?” This seems like a terrible marketing decision on somebody’s part. What’s odd about all of this is that the Japanese are usually so conservative, and yet this sexually explicit motorcycle somehow survived Kawasaki’s corporate infrastructure to become the best/ most offensive motorcycle I have ever owned.
How did I do in the race? I lost.
It's a shame you lost. With a bike like that?
I'd probably take it out back and...nevermind.
I had a dream I met you the other night. It felt very real. We talked about hotel soap.
Posted by: Selena | July 30, 2008 at 03:26 PM
2nd!
Posted by: Mitch | July 30, 2008 at 03:28 PM
question, why does the stella dvd say season one when its obvious there wasn't a second season? not knocking the show, i thought it was excellent, although i wonder who sows seeds on hardwood floors...
do i smell a second season brewing...
Posted by: the drunken blogger | July 30, 2008 at 03:37 PM
I hope the taping is in New York because I would love to go!
Posted by: Travis | July 30, 2008 at 03:39 PM
I'm guessing one must live in the NY or LA area to see a taping. Am I right? What do I win???
Posted by: Camille | July 30, 2008 at 03:48 PM
I'm going to need the following information ASAP:
1. Where can I get a bike like that?
2. When do you start taping the shows?
P.S. I'd most likely ride this bike to your taping.
Posted by: Susanna | July 30, 2008 at 04:14 PM
"Would you like to come us tape it?"
You might want to slip an "and see" in there.
I'd love to, thanks for asking. Oh wait, I live on the wrong continent!
As someone whose brother-in-law does dirtbiking, I'm gonna have to get inseider knowledge on that bike...
Posted by: Therese | July 30, 2008 at 04:34 PM
This guy just torn up your post about that Wall E movie. I think you should lay some justice upon this poor soul. MIB4life!!
Posted by: DreDay | July 30, 2008 at 04:35 PM
...and learn how to spell "insider", Jeez.
Posted by: Therese | July 30, 2008 at 04:35 PM
i'm excited about your show
Posted by: steg luh steg | July 30, 2008 at 05:33 PM
So is this like Gay Motocross that you're competing in?
And have you been to Japan? Conservative? I guess you haven't seen the Love Hotels, the pervy old men looking at cartoon underage porn, and the slobberingly wasted businessmen criss-crossing their way home at night. But yeah, they're kind of repressed. Which leads to the above interesting behavior.
Posted by: Bella | July 30, 2008 at 06:58 PM
That so-called information is coveted and you know it! Damn, MIB, what a tease.
Posted by: kristina | July 30, 2008 at 07:18 PM
Ok that's a good reason for not blogging. I am frreakiiiiing! michael and michael = heaven. Has the show been picked up? or are you guys doing the pilot? Shet we need more info about your show!!
Posted by: sarah | July 30, 2008 at 07:31 PM
Gotta love a bike with dick-shaped handlebars. It might actually get me to ride a bike again.
Posted by: Nickie | July 30, 2008 at 11:08 PM
Hmm. I too had a dream about you only mine involved scrabble and Little Ceasars.
The dirt bike sounds like it's straight out of Kawasucky Girls #5.
Posted by: Emma | July 31, 2008 at 12:04 AM
You lost the race and I lost my bet, and my home. Thanks.
Posted by: Ryalye | July 31, 2008 at 01:12 AM
wow to several things!
first: new show. getting reeeeally excited about it.
secondly: want to attend. but what if i'm broke? does this include free flight and lobster dinners at exclusive (or scary) hotels? awesome.
thirdly: dick bike. neat. :D
Posted by: Jenny | July 31, 2008 at 10:59 AM
I'm not so concerned that the muffler is belching jizz, but just that it is belching any color viscous _fluid_ is a bit disturbing, for a muffler. That's just me.
Also, you are good squishee. Glad to hear from you, even though you taunt me with free far away tickets. Damn you coasts, east and west. The gulf has feelings too you know!
Posted by: Jaime | August 01, 2008 at 01:40 AM
hell yeah you lost. what did you expect with a megafuck bike?
Posted by: shro | August 02, 2008 at 07:44 AM